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NE SUNNY DAY, ACTRESSES CAMERON Diaz, Christina Applegate and Selma Blair converge on an unsuspecting little bistro and bakery in West Hollywood, where they belch a lot, cuss a lot, order a few bowls of clam chowder, maintain that Spike Jonze is the coolest guy in town, impersonate both Jonathan Lipnicki and Ethel Merman, wonder how guys like their kernels to fit between their legs, declare affection for Britney Spears and say a few words about fish tacos.". And female friendship is something this trio seems to take seriously."It's the deepest thing, the most cherished," says Diaz. "I have a love for all people," she is saying, "except for total assholes and idiots." And choking on our bacon, we are quite certain we know who she means. " We pale, expecting the third degree and a full measure of the power of now. She said that when she was young, kids would ask her if her parents were bears, and all she could think of to say in response was, "No." This strikes us as infinitely sad, so today we don't bring it up, exactly.

But I had one the other day — a fish taco, not a vagina — and it was quite good."This provokes much hilarity among the women, of course, and because they are a fun-loving bunch, their laughter is of the war-loud, knee-slapping variety. "I don't have women around me who talk shit or are inconsiderate to other women. I mean, I don't want you to hang out with us, but would you want to? Actually, we are of two minds about what has happened here. Instead, we ask about boys ("Boys didn't like me when I was younger," she responds. Blair likes taking pictures and going on Outward Bound outdoor-adventure programs and diving for quarters at the bottom of swimming pools.

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But soon enough, they get down to more serious matters. Because it's all about taking care of each other and watching each other's backs.""We understand each other and our emotions," seconds Applegate."We're sisterly and nurturing," agrees Blair. Because of the sex factor."So that's the way it is here, very high-minded indeed. Because just then, Applegate turns to Blair: "I think I want to kiss you right now," she says. "This strikes all the women here as an avenue worth exploring. One mind is delighted at the way Diaz has defined boundaries and shut us down, for if you were close to her and hanging around in her circle, you could be sure, probably, that your secrets are safe with her. But now — well, now we mostly want to get the heck out of there, before Diaz can lay into us for lack of manners and logic. "I was a little chunkier than I am now"); about men ("I dated someone when I was seventeen who was, like, twenty-seven. And then, twelve years ago February 7th, he died,"She drops it just like that, "he died," taking our breath away. She doesn't like the way Mario, her gardener, knocks on her door and asks for a hug. .""So the pain won't be...""Yeah."After that, we sit there a while longer, in a kind of odd communion. We can still feel her warm, hot breath on our neck.

Really, they must discuss -takes-to-the-road movie in which they all star. As Diaz laughs and picks apart a muffin (wanting only the nuts inside), Blair leans over and presses her lips to Applegate's. You could be reading We call for the check and say to Diaz, "What is your favorite brand of toilet paper, and do you use a lot of it? "And it's a crime to use too much toilet paper, so I use just enough to do the job. It was my infatuation — and his getting to, you know ..."); and about vulnerabilities ("As a child, I was always working, taking dancing lessons, singing classes, acting classes. If so, and we think so, then Applegate has a pretty good lid on it. You do that when you're kids, you're greedy, and you don't know. "He's always macking on me, and it's driving me crazy! I know that sounds hokey, but it's harmless, right? I really don't want to wind up wearing Depends, in some place that smells like really bad chicken soup. It could happen, because of the time I spend in the backcountry. Then, at , she leaps to her feet, makes a bunch of noise about how her car is probably being towed right now, throws a hug on Brooke Shields on the way out, throws a good one on us, too, and vanishes into the night.

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Evidently, we have crossed some line maybe, unwittingly, we crossed that line long ago — and now Diaz will not even tell us the titles of books she is reading or whether she thinks she might be a high-maintenance type of girlfriend. "I have no idea." Naturally, we are dazed by this turn of events and splay back in our comfy chair, hoping to regroup. "It's, like, eight dollars to park downstairs, and I dont' have any cash. Then she removes a wad of gum from her mouth, crumples a piece of paper around it and makes it disappear.

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