You can't help, but think, "Damn, where have you been all my life? If by some crazy force of nature you guys do set a date and meet, chances are he is not who he claimed to be, or who you built him up to be.His confident demeanor is replaced with one that is far less interesting, and not having the phone as an easy buffer shows you a much different person than the one you thought you had been chatting with.I was holding myself back, I was playing up certain parts of myself, and playing down other characteristics, all so I could be more "desirable." I became who I thought I was supposed to be, not who I was.
Like basically every person alive right now, I tried online dating.
I figured if I wasn't on there, I was missing out, missing an opportunity and missing finding my person.
There was no energy, no butterflies, no eyes from across the room to say, "Hey, wait there's something special about this one, and we can't put our fingers on it." It was all brain, and no heart in who I decided to virtually flirt with.
You literally became a resume that I could toss into the trash pile without any real thought, or feeling, which isn't how finding our potential partner should work. I Became Way More Shallow Sure, whether it's real life or virtual reality, the first thing you notice is how someone looks, but in a real life, you quickly see how someone acts, moves, sounds, etc.
Yes, all those things did and do continue to play a part of who I am interested in, but online they became all I saw, and I left little room to be more open-minded than had I been meeting these gentlemen in person.
Sometimes you just don't know you're best angles, and sometimes you do, which is why I always say buyer beware when it comes to what you think you're getting online. I Don't Like Games And that's exactly what all these things are, games.I put only the best pictures of myself out there, but not what I look like when I wake up in the morning.I filtered myself in basically every way, and took what makes me uniquely special out of the equation, so I could be more "marketable." That isn't sexy, romantic or interesting.However, the problem arises when you finally do get excited, but continue to keep swiping because why not? No One Was Ever Who I Thought They Were As you make matches, swipe past people and possibly converse you start to build an idea of who the person is on the other side of the phone.You create an ideal, and all of a sudden every little nuance becomes a bigger complexity to who that person is, and how they operate. He either starts creeping real hard, says something that throws everything off, disappears or just never decides to meet up.I tried everything from tindr, to Jswipe, to grindr, to every other word that is missing an "e" in it.